Meditation: How to Practice and Why It Changes Everything
Let’s break the biggest myth right out of the gate:
Meditation is not about having no thoughts.
If you have a human brain, you have thoughts—between 6,000 – 60,000 of them per day according to recent cognitive neuroscience research (Tseng & Poppenk).
Trying to “clear your mind” is like trying to stop your heart from beating. It’s not the goal. It’s not the point.
The point is to practice.
What We Practice Grows Stronger
Meditation is attention training.
Every time you notice your mind has wandered and gently bring it back—you’re doing a rep.
That moment of returning?
That’s the magic.
That’s what changes the brain.
In fact, research using fMRI scans has shown that meditation thickens the prefrontal cortex (involved in decision-making, attention, and self-regulation) and shrinks the amygdala, the brain’s fear center (Lazar et al.).
And here’s the best part:
You can’t be bad at it.
No matter how often your mind wanders. The rep is in the return. And that rep is where the rewiring happens.
The Two Wings of Practice: Attention and Compassion
Meditation rests on two essential muscles:
Focused Attention
Self-Compassion
You train your mind by noticing where your attention is, and you train your heart by how you respond when you realize it’s wandered.
Yell at yourself? You’re training self-criticism.
Gently return? You’re training patience, kindness, and steadiness.
“What you practice grows stronger.”
This now-famous phrase from Dr. Shauna Shapiro reminds us that every moment of practice is shaping us.
“What you practice grows stronger, whether that’s judgment, anxiety, or kindness and clarity. You are literally rewiring your brain.”
— Shapiro, Shauna L. “The Science of Mindfulness.” Big Think, 2019.
How to Meditate (Really)
You don’t need a cushion. Or candles. Or quiet.
You just need three things:
A point of attention – your breath, a sound, a body sensation, a candle flame.
The willingness to notice when your attention has wandered.
The practice of coming back—without judgment.
You can do this for 2 minutes or 20. In your car. At your desk. During a roll call.
And with consistent practice, the changes add up—neuron by neuron, connection by connection.
Why This Changes Everything
Meditation grants you the capacity for presence.
And presence is the foundation of:
Self-awareness: You can’t change what you don’t see.
Self-regulation: The ability to pause, shift, and respond instead of react.
Relationship health: Your presence determines the quality of your connection.
Leadership: You lead better when you are centered, attuned, and emotionally steady.
Studies show that present-focused awareness improves relationship satisfaction, reduces emotional reactivity, and strengthens empathy and communication (Kemeny et al.; Carson et al.).
And in law enforcement and high-stakes professions, presence isn’t just nice—it’s life-saving.
What Do You Want to Grow?
Meditation is the training ground.
You’re not just sitting. You’re shaping who you are becoming.
Who do you want to be at home?
At work?
Under stress?
With your partner, your kids, your team?
The answer begins with your ability to pay attention.
Call to Action: Start Small, Start Now
This week, practice for just 2 minutes a day.
Pick your anchor: breath, sound, movement, a candle.
Every time you drift and come back, celebrate the rep.
No perfection required.
Just practice.
And remember—what you practice grows stronger.
Works Cited (MLA Format)
Carson, James W., et al. “Mindfulness-Based Relationship Enhancement.” Behavior Therapy, vol. 35, no. 3, 2004, pp. 471–494.
Kemeny, Margaret E., et al. “Contemplative/Emotional Training Reduces Negative Emotional Behavior and Promotes Prosocial Responses.” Emotion, vol. 12, no. 2, 2012, pp. 338–350.
Lazar, Sara W., et al. “Meditation Experience Is Associated with Increased Cortical Thickness.” Neuroreport, vol. 16, no. 17, 2005, pp. 1893–1897.
Shapiro, Shauna L. “The Science of Mindfulness.” Big Think, 2019, www.bigthink.com/videos/mindfulness-practice.
Tseng, Jennifer, and Jordan Poppenk. “Brain Dynamics of Thought Transition Reveal the Role of the Dorsal Attention Network in Thought Generation.” Nature Communications, vol. 11, no. 1, 2020, pp. 1–10.