The early American writer and influencer Dale Carnegie, most known for his book How to Win Friends and Influence People, once said, “When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion.”
Our brains are wired for emotion—and particularly for the negative. Psychologist Dr. Rick Hanson puts it this way: “Our brains are like Velcro for negative experiences and Teflon for positive ones.” Scientists call this the negativity bias.
Now, combine that bias with the profession of public safety, where you face not only your own stress but also the stress of others—and you have a perfect storm.
Secondhand Stress: The “S-word” You Can’t See but Always Feel
In a Harvard Business Review article Make Yourself Immune to Secondhand Stress, Shawn Achor and Michelle Gielan note research showing that 26% of people experience elevated cortisol levels simply by observing someone else under stress.
For police, fire, EMS, corrections, and dispatch, exposure to others’ distress isn’t occasional—it’s constant. You interact with people at their saddest, maddest, and baddest. And that’s just the start. Add to that the stress from:
Negative media coverage
Endless court delays
Bureaucracy and inconsistent supervision
Excessive overtime
Role conflicts and lack of team cohesion
Working holidays and missing family milestones
Being second-guessed after critical incidents
All while carrying the same personal and family stressors as anyone else
It’s truly remarkable we can function at all.
The Origins of Police Stress: A System Problem That Feels Personal
Lt. Brian Ellis, retired, calls out one of the most frustrating—and often overlooked—sources of stress in policing: the fragmentation of the criminal justice system.
From the moment you make an arrest to the outcome in court, there’s often a lack of cohesion between law enforcement, prosecutors, courts, corrections, and parole. You might spend hours on a case only to see deferred consequences, inconsistent sentencing, or poor follow-through. The result? A deep sense of powerlessness—and another layer of stress on top of an already demanding job.
Brian’s advice isn’t to simply “accept” this as the way things are. Instead, he challenges officers and leaders to actively build connections across the justice system. That could mean:
Meeting directly with district attorneys to learn what makes your reports most effective
Opening lines of communication with probation or parole officers to improve follow-up
Inviting prosecutors or judges to agency briefings for mutual understanding
These actions might not fix the whole system overnight—but they create personal influence, reduce frustration, and set an example for others to follow.
Three Action Steps to Reduce Stress—Starting Now
1. Set your intention and check your readiness for change.
Knowing something matters isn’t the same as acting on it. Ask yourself honestly: Am I ready to take steps toward change? If the answer is yes, start small and build momentum.
2. Identify your stressors—both the obvious and the hidden.
Set aside 10 minutes this week to write down the biggest stressors in your routine. Be specific: Is it waiting for court? A teammate’s negativity? Constant schedule changes? Decide which ones you can take action on, and which you can let go. The simple act of writing them down is therapeutic and brings clarity.
3. Practice a daily recovery tool.
Whether it’s 4×4 box breathing, a short meditation, or a brisk walk outside, your nervous system needs a daily “reset.” For example: Sit comfortably, inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4, exhale for 4, hold for 4—repeat for 2–3 minutes. This trains your body to return to baseline after stress spikes.
Bottom Line
In public safety, stress will always be part of the job. But powerlessness doesn’t have to be. You can counter secondhand stress and systemic frustrations by taking ownership of your mindset, your connections, and your recovery practices.
Call to Action:
For the next 7 days, do three things without fail:
Have one proactive conversation with someone in another part of the justice system.
Write down one stressor and one possible action you could take to reduce it.
Use a 2-minute breathing practice before you leave work each day to reset your nervous system.
The stress will still be there—but how it shapes you will be entirely up to you.